Friday, August 22, 2014

Conversation with a Needle, 2

A conversation began in the previous post (here). So, yesterday, I took my favorite needle in hand (Milliner's number 7), and said: Ms. Milliner, here's the plan. We're going to lay down fill-in stitches in nice, neat rows to contrast with all those curving lines. Got it?"

To my surprise, she answered: "Eeets Docteure Milliner, eef you pleez." (Oh my gosh, I forgot. I have French needles.)

Rather embarrassed, I replied: "Well, excuse me, Doctor. I had no idea. Where have you studied?"

Dr. Milliner: "At zee Steeetch (Stitch) University, of course. Eeets only zee best."

Me: "And what was the subject of your dissertation? Wait a minute, how did you attend classes?"

Dr. Milliner: "Haven't you heard of ze ordinateur (computer)? I vrote about zee use of Milliner's needles by artists en Tunisie."

Me: "Really? And what did your research reveal?"

Dr. Milliner: "Vell, you are probablement zee only one: you vere my case study."

Me: "Really! Hmmm. When was the defence of your dissertation?"

Dr. Milliner: "Remember a couple of months ago you thought you had lost zee package of Milliner's needles? Vell, zee whole package came vis me."

Me: "So what are you working on now?"

Dr. Milliner: "I vould like to publish my research as a book...but, I'll need your permission for zee photos."

Me: "No problem. Do you have a publisher?"

Dr. Milliner: "Zat's a leettle difficult. You know anyone? Zee audience eez a bit limited, specialisé..."

Me: "Can't help you there. I've got the same problem myself. Good luck. Now can we get back to the stitching?"

Dr. Milliner: "Pas de problème, but remember, I am zee expert."

Me: "Fine." 

And so we got into the stitching. It seemed to start out fairly straight.

Then I noticed wavy lines developing and curves...

Ahhh, how can one argue with an expert?

Linked to Nina Marie's "Off the Wall Friday."


Mo Crow said...

oh ha! what a bossy Needle!

Liz Ackert said...

Amazing how attached one can become to a needle ... I just bought some more of my favorites when I realized I only had two more in the packet I bought years and years ago (John James size 10 betweens)

Sharon Rotz said...

Charming post.
What fun to have the opinion of your "expert" equipment.

Margaret said...

Looks like she has you on "zee Kantha keek", eh? Good luck! ;-)

Vicky aka Stichr said...

Needle Defense here....have you noticed that even a curved needle, like those for upholstery, make straight stitches? It's the FABRIC that causes the curves. NOT the needle. So maybe you should have the fabric tested for substance use?? Maybe the dyes make the fabric a little crazzzzyyyy??

love this BTW!